It has been a rough couple of months for me lately.
For some reason, I feel like I’m so far from where I need to be. Thoughts of inadequacy and doubt about the future meet with me often.
There’s also been a constant struggle to find a balance between consistent devotion to my faith and getting work done. In the back of my mind, I know which one is most important, and which one carries more weight to me.
And yet, I let days pass without much change. Instead, I put on a face that expresses the opposite of how I really feel.
My heart cries out for something different. Something more.
Not just to make me feel better (tons of other things could do that), but to provide a sense of meaning and purpose in my journey.
People always say smiling changes the environment you’re in. I get that. You want to keep the mood as bright as possible because you don’t want to bring rain clouds over someone else’s parade.
But it does little for those who understand they’re not in a great mood. They know they’ll have to go home with the thoughts that keep them down.
And they know the only person responsible for that change is the one staring back in the mirror.
Sometimes running from our need to create from an emotional place makes us feel empty too; like there’s something missing from this puzzle of life.
Fear is most often the root cause of it.
I could write with a true sense of how I feel (most of the time I do). But sometimes I fearfully choose not to, even after prepping for an entire day.
The common thought is usually something like you need more courage or you need to let go of your fear, which is true to an extent.
But perhaps we just need to use the courage we already have and watch it grow.
Maybe we need to use our fear to propel us forward, knowing that they are reactions that tell us we’re going beyond our comfort zones and into higher stages of growth, self-improvement, and focus.
Create from the place that moves you because the world needs it and so do you.
Be determined to do what you can to make your reality different. Because how you see your life in its current stage impacts the steps you may take today.